Drag Hag

I was talking to Princess the other day about RuPaul’s Drag Race. Bizarrely for someone who loves make up and used to work in a drag bar back in the early days of living in London, I’ve only ever seen one episode of it (actually with Sir and Princess.)

She and I were discussing how many millions of people must have discovered their sexuality (or become allies or more aware of LGBTQ+ culture) because of RuPaul and Drag Race. We were both trying to work out who are first drag queen was and despite our age gap both of us thought RuPaul had probably been our introduction to drag culture.

I definitely remember having a card advertising the original Viva Glam lipstick back in 1994. The fifteen year old me was bewitched by the unisex glamour of MAC Cosmetics which were unobtainable in Ireland in those days and I was dazzled by RuPaul in a frock and k.d lang in a suit both gender bending for a good cause.

I stuck that card to my wall above the desk I studied for my GCSEs at and stared at it as some kind of portal to a world where anyone could wear make up and be who they wanted. And like many people before and since I found that world in the local gay bars.

My hometown only had one gay bar that advertised itself as such while one other pub had an upstairs room frequented by what we’d now call bears and tended to be too old for my friends and I to go. I got to know the gay friendly haunts well as I had several barely out gay friends and was a safe person to accompany them as they met men for fun for the first time.

It never occurred to me that some of those men were bisexual until one Monday night a female friend and I tripped along to the gay bar for Miss Penelope Pitstop’s Big Balls Bingo with our town’s possibly only drag queen mixing local banter and high camp to a mixed audience.

Since she was a minister’s daughter she got a fit of guilt about being there and left abruptly (although her parents were very welcoming when she came out as bisexual herself soon after even if she had a tendency to act like the only gay in the village after she did.)

I figured I could finish my drink safely in a bar full of men with eyes for each other and was slightly surprised when suddenly I was hugged hard and joined at my table by a guy I knew from my clubbing days. We’d always enjoyed drug fuelled conversations after big nights out crashed out on aged sofas in student houses talking earnestly while off our faces but had never really spoken sober.

I didn’t really think much of seeing him there until we were well into the bingo and drinks and he mentioned he knew Miss Penelope herself. In a stroke of almost embarrassing naivety I enquired how and he paused and batted his eyelashes at me and casually said he liked to suck her cock while she was in full make up.

I know my mouth made a perfect O in response to that. Not because as he thought for a second because I was shocked or horrified but because I was instantly turned on by the thought of it and fuelled by gin and confidences told him so. He grinned and signalled for more drinks. I knew that night wasn’t going to go home as early as my friend had.

We played several rounds of bingo, failing to make a house at any point since our attention had shifted to making eyes at each other. Having only ever discussed politics and putting the world to rights with this guy I was delighted to discover he was funny and incredibly fucking filthy.

I had no qualms when the bingo ended and he bought me a drink, kissed me on the lips and told me to entertain myself before disappearing for about fifteen minutes. I was amusing fag hag fodder to the other men in the bar who thought a wide eyed girl in a bar with a dabber had no idea what was going on.

My date reappeared and rescued me, sliding onto the seat beside me and his tongue into my mouth as he kissed me still tasting of cock and come. His hand definitely crept up my skirt and we looked very straight in a public place. That was our cue to leave together.

We fell into a cab kissing hard enough that the cab driver had to remind us we’d arrived twice. There was no pausing for drinks or polite chit chat in that way people do when they pretend they haven’t gone home together to fuck. We went straight to the bedroom.

I noticed two things that surprised me. For a man of barely twenty who appeared to live separately to his parents his room was immaculate with a properly made bed and even more unusually he was holding the first sex toy I’d ever seen.

He pushed me down on my knees and started pulling my tights down and skirt up so my panties were just low enough to sneak a peek at my cunt and for him to wedge the dildo he was holding into them so it stuck out like a cock that I had to hold tightly in place by pressing my thighs together.

I could feel my cunt soaking wet around it and making it tricky to keep in place with how slick my knickers felt. But when he knelt down, pulling his long hair off his face and started sucking the dildo like he clearly had been with Miss Penelope’s cock before we left together. I looked down watching his head bob and up and down on the dildo taking it deeper than I knew was possible.

I was so turned on and wet watching his floorshow I almost didn’t notice his final flourish as he deep throated the dildo pulling it out of my panties with his lips before putting his mouth back on my cunt and licking me with equal enjoyment and vigour.

My cunt responded in delight as I discovered my first bisexual man that night. We fucked hard that night so that my first time using a sex toy was with his mouth and ass. I did enjoy his legs eleven for me, cock in hand and getting his jackpot that way.

Maybe not the most common introduction to drag culture I’ll agree but one I’ve remembered for years since…

 

Drag Hag

Sing For My Supper

My Master was clearly pleased how my cunt was behaving after my time off and straight after letting me come a second time riding the John Holmes toy with the Doxy on my clit suggested we have dinner together on Friday night.

I wasn’t sure if he was suggesting a civilised meal or a debauched threesome but either way I was happy. I’m easy going about social plans with him and Princess but I did hint that perhaps we should stay in as I had an interesting outfit to wear that was not restaurant appropriate.

Sir knows I rarely try to influence his orders so took the hint seriously and we arranged I’d see them at their flat later. I’m particularly enjoying getting dressed up at the moment after basically wearing house clothes and pyjamas for weeks but even I was impressed by how slutty tonight’s outfit was.

I’ve discovered how delightfully impractically slutty bodysuits are recently and both my Master and Princess seem very taken with them. I wore one the other night to a local restaurant with them that was just the ‘make the table next to us tut, but he couldn’t stop staring when his girlfriend wasn’t looking’ level of see through on the nipples.

But tonight I needed something that would raise that game and see if the civilised meal would be postponed by some debauchery. When I arrived and Sir was in the shower I enjoyed taking my jacket off and giving Princess a sneak peek of my top so she was already getting turned on when he walked out of the bathroom in just a towel.

Literally within seconds of seeing my completely sheer body suit with just sequinned stars covering my nipples, my Master’s cock was hard, the towel was on the floor and so was I, kneeling with his cock in my mouth as Princess watched.

He ordered us both into the bedroom where Princess took over sucking his cock and I enjoyed playing with her cunt as she did, watching her get wetter and more open with each slap I gave her cunt and groan my Master gave as she deep throated his cock.

Sir stopped her before she made him come and he and I both slipped two fingers inside her cunt and made her come beneath us, holding her legs up and open so she could get fucked harder and deeper than usual.

I’m still a little delicate so my Master let me lie down on the bed, bodysuit now open and my face buried in Princess’s cunt as he teased me with his cock until I squirmed back onto it and fucked me firmly but gently while spanking my ass until I came.

I got my breath back with my cunt over Princess’s face, holding her legs up for him agains so he could fuck her ass until he came inside her and she was gasping with another orgasm thanks to the wand on her clit.

Definitely a delightful taste of debauchery before dinner…

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Sing For My Supper

Hypnosis for Sluts

My Master has introduced me to the idea of hypnosis for making me more of a slut, especially if it can teach me to deepthroat.

I’ve been pretty freaked out by most of the stuff I’ve heard so far online and it’s made me tense and definitely not able to get open or gaping. This podcast on the subject is really interesting though.

I love going into that subspace where I am so focused on my Master that I want to do anything for him and my mouth and ass and cunt relax and open up even more.

Anyone got any other suggestions for hypnosis for sluts so I can get there and beyond? Ready, willing and able sounds like how I want to be.

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