A Strong Bond

Double column tie Shibari rope bondage

I think we all know I have a fairly interesting life but even I was surprised to spend my Saturday afternoon being tied up. Especially since it wasn’t my Master doing it.

Instead I volunteered to help my best friend learn the new skill of Shibari or Japanese rope bondage by being his willing assistant and my Master kindly shared me in return for some photographs.

I’ve never been tied up before unless you count the occasional bed restraints and a very formative childhood experience where some of my brother’s friends tied my hands to a stepladder leaving me kneeling there for ages with a couple of other girls. I think it was a good old fashioned game of Cowboys and Indians that went a little bit darker than the parents who came looking for us eventually were happy with.

I remember the other girls were crying and objecting while I found it the most peaceful experience to the extent where I wondered if there was something ‘wrong’ with me. I felt so incredibly disappointed when I was untied and made to get up and then told how awful it was. I could have stayed there all night frankly. I was about six and I guess that was my first experience of subspace.

I usually like the comforting feeling of being contained by a waist trainer or a blindfold or some kind of restraint but I wondered if rope would make me feel panicky and constricted but I trust my best friend implicitly and there would be no issue if I didn’t like it and no one would be left disappointed and horny.

But I liked being tied up a lot. She started simply with hand ties using a smooth silk rope that felt fantastic against my skin. Despite me knowing nothing about Shibari, I knew instantly when she’d got the ties right because they supported my joints perfectly and took the weight for me allowing me to hold my arms (and later legs) up more easily than I could do myself.

One of the annoying symptoms of my illness is chronic joint and muscle pain and I was slightly concerned being tied up would increase that. I was thrilled to discover that it actually helped and looked much more erotic and submission than using heaped up cushions or stopping to shift position.

We had a lot of fun and laughter and a surprising lack of weirdness about what we were doing and I was impressed how easily she handled the rope and make it work for her. I also enjoyed discussing with her in her top role what I as a submissive would enjoy with Shibari.

There is a real sense of vulnerability and trust in allowing someone to tie you up and we both agreed that this was a time blindfolds wouldn’t work for either of us but instead being told to focus on a certain spot or keep your eyes closed would add more frisson and less friction.

Oddly all the discussion of how submissive rope play is was making me much brattier than usual because by the time I sent the photos of her handiwork to my Master, I was so sure I wanted to try it with him that I was tempted to demand it and pout if he refused.

He was rather impressed by her skills and my enthusiasm and didn’t sound like he needed much persuasion. I hope he has some knot tying skills. Especially when we moved onto the hemp rope and a chest harness next and took it all up a notch…

Spreader ankle tie Shibari rope bondage


A Strong Bond

John Holmes

I think we all know I like that John Holmes toy a lot. It’s gone from being a monster I could barely manage any of to my standard dildo these days and it never fails to please me or my Master when I use it.

I was aware that it’s modelled on the real life cock of legendary porn star John Holmes thanks to the booklet that comes with it when you buy it. But I had no idea his life was quite as dramatic as it was until my best friend sent me a link to this essay about him from Rolling Stone magazine the other night.

Almost as long as his cock, it’s well worth a read especially if you like good journalism or true crime. I always thought the film Boogie Nights was based on his life, but they clearly toned it down a bit to get their Oscar nominations. I can see why.

But a little trip round Google lead me to discover that John Holmes did not exactly tone it down in his porn career. Many of the clips are available on PornHub and his cock really was as eye-poppingly huge in real life as in its silicone namesake.

It’s a pity he really does look like a pervy accountant to off set a cock like that, but I was amused and surprisingly aroused by some of the porn clips. We’ll skip over the fascination with fifteen year old girls in them but they look like real people fucking for fun which is sorely missing for me in a lot of modern porn.

I don’t like that slickness with mainstream porn where each sexual act is a tick box and the orgasm is literally a money shot to sell as many clips as possible. There’s something far too brisk and business-like about a lot of porn these days. Like watching people have one night stands where they try to score sexual points rather than enjoy many perverted pleasures human bodies can combine to offer.

I like my smut more realistic than styled and enjoyed the fact the John Holmes’ clips had that amateur reality instead of professional glossiness that somehow renders sex decidedly unsexy. I do see where the unfortunate trope of bad acting in the non porn bits comes from though!

I think I’m going to find it very interesting indeed the next time I play with my John Holmes toy after that little history lesson though…

John Holmes