Hot Wax

My Master and I have had many many kinky conversations but like they say, you always remember your first. And out first ever filthy chat focused quite heavily on the thought of hot wax.

We discussed it several times in the early days of our relationship (back when I was being a slow learner and hadn’t realised we were properly doing D/s) and I actually bought a big bag of soy wax in anticipation.

And then we got sidetracked with all the other ridiculously fun and filthy kink over the last three years and the bag of wax got forgotten about until a recent clear out brought it to mind again.

It is testament to how much I was determined not to miss hot wax with my Master this time that I actually sent him a specific date I had in mind for it and more or less gave him an order for the first time in our relationship.

Life has got in the way of my Master and I doing any full D/s for a few months and I’ve been missing it. Submission doesn’t just turn me on but sort of recharges my emotional batteries too so for me the scene started long before Sir got to my house.

Researching how best to melt the wax and what to apply it with, picking out what to wear or not wear on the night, incorporating Princess into what I was setting up and then laying out my living room so that it was as close to a dungeon as I can get it meant my excitement built all week.

By the time I was getting dressed for Sir with full slutty make up designed to smudge and smear over the scene for Princess, I had that excitement that you can feel in both your stomach and your cunt. I was the tiniest bit worried I’d built the anticipation up too much as I knelt blindfolded re-acquainting myself with John Holmes for the first time in months as I waited for them to arrive.

I think it was about thirty seconds in when I realised the evening was in fact going to exceed my wildest expectations. My Master started me off by sitting back in my armchair glass of whisky in his hand letting me find his cock with my mouth.

Not only did his cock taste particularly good but he pulled me deeper down on it than I can usually manage by raking his hands through my hair and up and down my back and shoulders which made melt down onto his cock like I couldn’t get enough. Just as I was so blissed I could barely move my mouth round him, he swapped places with Princess and I buried myself in her lap too.

Sir ordered us both onto the floor on our knees and took turns fucking us. He filled me up with his cock and left me wanting more as he pulled Princess on top of him with her ass in the air and told me to use her as my toy. It was time to get the temperature play part of the evening going.

Alongside my hot wax I’d laid out an ice bucket and buried my favourite curved glass butt plug inside it. I left Princess’s ass hot and stinging after a few hard slaps and then pressed the ice cold toy against her. She took the toy in one go and sat down so hard on Sir’s cock I was envious of how filled up she was.

They didn’t leave me for long though, working together as Princess put me in the spreader bar as Sir tied my hands and arms so I was flat on my back, legs spread wide and unable to stop either of them from doing anything to me. I was completely naked, totally immobile and very vulnerable.

It was exactly the moment I wasn’t sure if I could take the pain I thought would be coming and I almost wanted to safe word before we’d even begun. This amount of anticipation after a whole week of waiting was unbearable. I was so wrapped up in in that moment I almost didn’t notice the first drip of wax for a second until a sting of beeswax brought me out of my thoughts and right into the scene.

I didn’t have more than a split second to breathe in before a warm wave of hot wax washed over me. Smoother softer cooler soy wax felt like pure pleasure on my skin. I could feel myself slide into subspace where my body and mind feel incredibly sensitive and attuned yet in soft focus.

Sir flicked and dripped the wax over my tits, warming my nipple piercings with residual heat which gave me much more sensation than I ever get there especially as Princess was flicking her tongue over my clit at the same time. I was just basking on ripples of warmth and orgasms as the sensations built with layers of hardening wax.

It was the first time my Master and Princess have worked together on a kink scene where I am doing active submission rather than just being submissive as I fuck and it felt like being passed from hand to hand if they weren’t letting my feet touch the ground like floating completely securely.

The wax kept coming running and dripping down my torso and arms, flicking onto my legs and tightening as it dried. I knew my Master and Princess were taking turns with it concentrating in places while alternating with bright hot splashes of the beeswax anytime I looked like I was starting to zone too far out.

Usually when I submit to Sir I am very quiet, almost non verbal but this scene pushed me out of that habit because I knew that to keep this pleasure coming I needed to give feedback as it was so unlike anything we’ve played with before. I’ve always thought that talking during a scene would take me out of it but in fact I discovered it enhanced everything.

Although maybe my Master also likes me silent because he gave Princess the order to use the Doxy on me at this point. The way she pulsed it and pressed it against my cunt made me lose my voice into the pull of five orgasms one after like a complete slut as the wax ran across my bare cunt feeling exactly like the warmth of squirting.

I was utterly spent. And my Master and Princess were just ready to get started on each other. I lay back watching as Sir slid his cock into Princess’s stretched welcoming ass and fucked her so hard they both collapsed into me as he came into her.

It was the perfect way to crack the wax they’d worked so hard to build up so that when they untied me and pulled me up off the floor there was a perfect line of wax around my body to prove how we’d spent two kinky hours that were more than worth the wait….

wax lines

Hot Wax

Heat Me Up

I’ve had more conversations about boilers recently than anything else. Not only did mine decided to go on strike over the weekend but a friend might just have embarked on a illicit *thing* with the gas safety engineer who came to check hers the other week.

I did laugh as she sighed over a glass of wine that you can’t just fuck the boiler guy and thought to myself ‘I would’. It was only after she went home and I was clearing up the glasses that I remembered I had fucked the boiler guy once.

The only reason I didn’t text her to tell her that as encouragement is that while I didn’t mind her knowing my wicked ways but I did feel slightly embarrassed that my wicked ways are so debauched that I’ve got beyond forgetting the names of people I’ve fucked and into just forgetting whole people I’ve fucked. Being a slut is one thing. Being a slut with a terrible memory is a whole different game.

But when I was lying in bed that night I was pleased to note that I remembered the boiler guy extremely well when I thought back. He’d come to check gas safety certificate and do some maintenance work to allow the boiler to be signed off so was going to be there for a couple of hours.

Somehow the conversation went from flues and valves to tattoos. And it turns out this gas engineer was a tattoo obsessive with full sleeves and coordinating chest and back pieces of botanically accurate Japanese cherry blossom which I have to say I wasn’t expecting in deepest south London.

His face lit up in that way that happens when you give people permission to talk about the thing they love and that was the moment I realised the boiler guy was extremely good looking. I have always been an absolute slut for men who lose their self consciousness and just enjoy their interests even if they are silly or geeky or unfashionable.

And this guy loved Japanese sakura. I mentally skipped over the bit where he mentioned travelling to Japan to see the blossom in person on his honeymoon and listened to him describe how beautiful it was. I was trying to picture how that might look tattooed on his body when I realised he was asking me did I want to see the artwork?

I must have said yes but next thing I knew his shirt had come off and his tattoos were right there along with his nicely muscled torso. He turned and paraded for me so I could take in the detail of each black and white blossom and flower. And the only other thing I am a bigger slut for than lack of self consciousness is really really good tattoos on men.

And these were some of the most beautiful tattoos I have ever seen. Clearly designed as one whole piece and with an artist who wanted to use and enhance the shape of this guy’s body with light and shade, it literally flowed and cascaded down his back and arms and showed off both his skin and the sheer movement of his body with each little ripple or flex of a muscle or tendon.

It was incredibly hot. The kind of hotness where the room seems to grow thick with anticipation and time seems to slip and slide slowly but inevitably to the moment you start fucking. He lifted my hands onto his arms and let them move across this carpet of flowers and start sliding down onto the smooth but unmarked skin of his stomach.

I’m not sure if my hands moved themselves almost without control or he guided them but I was undoing his trousers and he was completely naked in my hallway, his body contrasted between the black and white of the top and the bare flesh of the bottom drawing my eye right to the middle and his hard cock.

He was still in the hall where anyone could see through my front door when I went down on my knees to suck his cock. I could feel his muscles tense and although I wasn’t able to see it from that angle I could just picture how good his back looked flexing like that. I loved that I was fully dressed and he was completely naked.

Something caused a noise outside and we both realised what we were doing and he stepped into my living room and closed the door to give slightly more privacy and possibility to fuck. I used the break to go and find some condoms in my bedroom and when I came back was greeted by another favourite sight that goes straight to my cunt.

He was standing cock in hand with that same lack of self consciousness as earlier and exactly how I imagine he makes himself come when he’s alone. I love that familiarity men have with their own bodies and it always makes me horny to watch. He just kept pulsing and clenching his hand on his cock so smoothly I hardly noticed he’d slipped the condom on while I’d got undressed.

He pulled me down on top of him on the carpet and we fucked. I had a fantastic view of his arms and chest and those tattoos almost til the last second when he pulled me down hard onto his torso and came into me. I remember grabbing his arms and pulling him against me until I came and then lying back for one last glance of that beautiful blossom.

I can’t remember how we disentangled ourselves but it wasn’t awkward. None of that ‘what the fuck just happened?’ wash of shame or regret. Almost that feeling of it just being how things are sometimes. I’m fairly sure in a stroke of pure Irish sluttery I made us tea while he got dressed again and went back to being a gas engineer without this ink superpower under his shirt.

After he left I thought many times about his tattoos and the effect body modification can have. In fact the impact lasted so long and so vividly in my mind’s eye that’s why I’d forgotten about the boiler connection til now. I think I could probably still draw his tattoos but I couldn’t tell you what his face looked like.

I’d only know it was him come to fix my boiler again in the future if he recognised me or happened to have stripped his shirt off before he got here. I won’t lie. The latter would have made a midnight boiler call out last night much more fun…

Heat Me Up

Fuzzy

Not only is my brain still fuzzy from being ill, so is the rest of my body. Being stuck in bed all week saving my energy to have a shower doesn’t give me most energy wiggle room for the other bits of the work that goes into my usual femme self.

So while I’d never judge anyone else for choosing not to shave, I feel like I’m wearing the wrong skin when I don’t. I don’t feel cute or empowered by casting off the patriarchy’s shackles of not shaving. I just feel furry and un-femme.

And a month of being stuck in bed with not much more to do then watch my leg hair grow has made me realise just how much of my sexual energy is linked to the confidence I feel in my femme presentation. Having my hair *just* right, my legs and cunt smooth and my nails polished makes me feel sexual. It’s as much lubrication for flirting and feeling sexual as my actual cunt getting wet.

So I know I’m coming back to life sexually when I start to get the itch to shave smooth again. I always dither between where to start. Do I start from my ankles and work up to my cunt in order and anticipation? Or use a trimmer to reveal my cunt lips again after them feeling so covered up for weeks and then wet shave everything in one go until my skin is so smooth and sleek it almost squeaks?

Either way I know the feel of my skin sliding against the sheets at night starts to wake my brain up so my dreams get interesting again. It starts imagining being pressed against Sir’s chest hair as he fucks me or running my hands over those fine golden hairs on Princess’s thighs as she holds the Doxy against her clit. When those dreams start leading to orgasms in my sleep then it definitely bodes well for how my body will behaves during the day too.

It’s amazing how sharp a razor make you feel…

Fuzzy

Polish and Shine

I think regular readers of the blog know I have a thing about painted nails. I feel undressed and exposed not having my nails immaculately painted at all times. A little chip else is like being as undone as a ladder in my tights or discovering I spilt toothpaste on my top and have to wear it all day.

I’ve loved nail polish since I was a child. It was the ‘acceptable’ femme indicator in a country where make up beyond a little powder and lipstick for church were ‘fast’. It also had the glamour of the city that sat much more comfortably with me than the scrubbed bare hands of the side of my family who were farmers.

Every single year for Christmas I asked Father Christmas for a bottle of pink Tinkerbell nail polish which could be peeled off and didn’t make the whole nail polish thing seem quite so adult to actual adults. Santa clearly had opinions about the subject though because he never noticed that bit on my letter.

So when I was old enough to start going shopping down the town on my own at the age of about eleven or twelve, the first thing I bought was a bottle of black nail polish. I wore it religiously throughout my teens even if I had to pull my sleeves down to hide it from teachers and relatives who couldn’t decide if it symbolised Satan or sluttiness.

I still fall back on black nail polish as a perennial favourite nearly thirty years later but since I started blogging here I’ve branched out to appreciate the power of perfect red nails too. Not just on me either, but on Princess’s fingers too interspersed with orders that proved I was definitely on the side of slutdom not Satan all along.

It’s hot to paint her nails (and this fantastic piece from Tits and Test Tubes on using nail polish to domme a girl made me very tempted to give Princess festive red tipped fingers this week) and I do love the impact a little extra colour adds to fucking myself. But it never occurred to me if there’s dominance in painting nails, there’s submission too.

Until I found myself painting Sir’s nails the other night that was and then it was as crystal clear to me as the best top coat in town. He and Princess were trying out Torture Garden to see if it was smutty and slutty enough for us to play at and in absence of being able to go with them, I had offered to help them dress up.

Sir’s make up needed the edge of nail polish to tie everything together to make sure it was an outfit not a costume. Black latex top, black leather shorts, stockings, suspenders, the sharpest pair of black boots I’ve seen in years and black eye make up that shimmered dark green if you looked closely. The nails just capped it all off.

I didn’t expect that sitting across a table from Sir fully clothed with a tiny bottle of beetle black nail polish in my hands would be one of the most submissive things I’ve ever done. I didn’t touch anything except his hands and yet it felt so incredibly submissive I could feel myself slipping into that subspace that feels like the calm focus before sleep. The state where you could take any order at all.

I am very well acquainted with my Master’s hands. They’ve held me up, pushed me down, made me come countless times and been completely inside me. I’ve often glanced at them in public and remembered what they’ve done in private but I’ve never just sat and held them before.

Completely non sexually, just spread out on the kitchen table in front of me, letting me position his hand as I needed and apparently give him the directions for a change. Patiently allowing me to turn each finger and pay attention to each nail. Pointing out when I missed a bit. Sitting still to let each coat dry. Making sure they were absolutely perfect and that I wasn’t rushing the task or cutting corners.

It was a full hour of my full attention on him and his hands and it reminded me that submission doesn’t have to be inherently sexual. In fact sometimes taking the direct sexual content out of it makes it deeper. We didn’t fuck, we didn’t touch apart from doing nails then his make up.

But I couldn’t stop thinking about it when I went home. Some of that is that he looks even better in stockings than I’ve spent the last three years imagining and I could look at his legs all day in them. Yet despite always wanting to see him in stockings it was submission that was on my mind instead.

I’d definitely be interested in more acts of non sexual submission to him in the coming year but then again I’m also very interested in him letting me paint his nails again and then fist me knowing how perfect his hands look…

Polish and Shine

Come Together

I’ve never been one for associating music with sex. I’ve never really understood that whole ‘our song’ thing and back in my teens and twenties when music was much more a part of my day to day, my tastes didn’t really suit sex unless you could move like your life depended on it. I was also put off by the occasions men would pick a soundtrack to fuck to, never sure if it was worse to hear ‘Let’s Get It On’ for the millionth time or the utterly jaw-dropping choice of Sham 69’s ‘Evil Way’ once*.

But the other night my Spotify Discover Weekly came up with The Beatles ‘Come Together’ and it definitely made me think of my Master and Princess. How could I not with the lines “He say. One and one and one is three. Got to be good looking ’cause he so hard to see. Come together right now over me”?

It’s not often songs reference three people without one of them being a home wrecker so that certainly tickled me as much as the title summons up filthy images. One of the best things I’m finding about a  long term sexual relationship is that sense of knowing someone so well you can adapt to them and have those simultaneous orgasms that most people think only exist in films.

Both my last threesomes with my Master and Princess ended with us all coming at the same time first with her watching my Master fuck me stupid and then with me watching her take three cocks at once and him coming in her mouth as I made myself come with the Doxy.

Princess is by no means the cock slut I am so when she took a huge extender that Sir had bought to fuck me more open with and started fucking herself with it while his cock was buried in me both Sir and I were very pleasantly surprised.

I’d started her off with the pink toy in her cunt and she clearly wanted more, filling herself up with the extender and taking advantage of its open side to slide a second cock inside it to push two fingers inside to get her going while she watched Sir fuck me for the second time that day.

My cunt was so well fucked after his cock twice and the Doxy once that unusually I wasn’t quite as greedy for cock as normal and unable to take my Master as deep as is my habit. Princess however wasn’t filled up enough with the extender and put the pink toy inside it to help fuck herself harder as she rode both on her knees and begged for the Doxy on her clit too.

Sir is always scrupulously fair with us both and always makes sure we both get fucked equally so if he hadn’t taken himself out of my cunt and into Princess’s mouth then and there, I would have felt greedy keeping him all to myself considering how desperate for dick she was.

Lying on her back with the double toy in her cunt and Sir’s cock deep in her mouth, she’s rarely looked sluttier and I can’t remember if Sir told me or I couldn’t help myself and I lifted the Doxy onto her clit while she swallowed him and fucked herself in tandem. I knew exactly when to turn the wand up so she would come and open her mouth even wider and wetter for Sir to come into.

Watching both of them change pace, catch their breath, tense their muscles, make noise and deepen in concentration was so fucking hot to see. There’s no boredom in knowing the pitch and sway of their orgasms so well, no sense of ‘seen it all before’ but more the flow of a well rehearsed performance piece coming (literally) together.

It meant I knew exactly when to press the Doxy full power on Princess’s achingly greedy cunt and lean against them both so that the vibrations of the toy and the way she lifts her hips when she comes would go straight to my cunt and make me come at the same time they both did. Pitch perfect timing even with the element of  surprise of Princess being so cock hungry for once.

The only thing that would have been hotter than that synchronicity is if Sir had actually “come together right now over me” and come over Princess’s face or tits instead so I could see it even more clearly than in her mouth. We might need an encore next time….

 

*Spoiler alert: someone actually played me this song while we fucked and my orgasm curled up, died and moved to Australia. Just seeing the lyrics is bad enough but it’s sung in a mock Cockney accent that could wilt a dildo.

Come Together

The Right Note

I loved music when I was a teenager. All my spare time and cash went on getting my hands on music or going to see live music. I love the aspect of collecting it and seeking things out  and finding people you had the same musical tastes in common with. And I loved that it was a great way to meet men.

Men love women who are into things’ they think of as ‘boy’s interests’. Girls who love football or computer games or drink beer are often jokingly referred to as ‘cool girls‘ with the slight sting in the tail that no matter how  much you really love ninja movies or comics or whatever you will be accused of only doing it to impress men.

So while I loved the bands I was into, I also learned quite quickly that I could happily subvert the sexual stereotype to my own advantage and get fucked in the process. And on a couple of occasions I got my hands on an import only issue album as well as their cock. A win-win situation for me frankly.

On this occasion though it was a gig. I was about seventeen and they were a local band done good internationally coming home to an adoring crowd. It was the kind of night you know you’d talk about for years as a teenager and it would be packed. There’s a certain kind of freedom that comes with crowds.

I went with some friends and before the support band had even finished the set I’d some how lost them in the mass of people. I can’t remember if that bothered me to be on my own in a crowd of handsy men as a kid or I felt liberated by it. But I remember glancing round looking for a little space to carve out for myself and tucking into it.

Then I noticed the guy standing there too. Maybe I’d noticed them already and that was why I picked out that space, but I was completely aware of his presence. He just seemed to fill the space in a way that wasn’t at all intimidating. More in the way that made me want to lean against him.

We exchanged polite pleasantries, just enough to make it definitely consensual not not creepy. For some reason I remember that he was from Southampton which meant he was passing through and I wasn’t likely to see him again. This gave me permission to misbehave and embrace the fact he was in holiday mode when people behave the way they want not the way they should.

Luckily I was wearing a skirt. My grandmother would have described it as a belt with that tone of disapproval but that’s exactly why I loved it. It was probably the shortest skirt I’ve ever owned and looked like black leather. That skirt was my secret weapon for several years and I’ve always wanted to find one like it again.

Being December I was also wearing tights but as I slipped in front of the guy and leaned into his chest like guys do with their girlfriends at gigs to hold them in place away from thrashing arms and grabby hands, he reached down and used his thumbs to rip the crotch of my tights open. My underwear was easy to push aside so now he had perfect access.

I was pressed against him in an incredibly dark crowded space where no one could hear a single thing except the band and despite several thousands of people round us we had a surprising amount of privacy. He took advantage of that by using his fingers to make me arch my back and have to hold my myself up while he made me come in public.

He teased me that the more I squirmed and seemed to collapse against him he’d pull back and leave me on the edge making me stand up straight several times before allowing me to come and using his spare arm to hold me up as I ground down on his fingers and pressed against his incredibly hard cock.

Neither of us were paying any attention to the band. But luckily everyone else was. After the second, maybe third orgasm, he spun me round and started walking me out of the crowd. There was a balcony of seats upstairs in the venue which a few people were using for smoking and drinking smuggled in booze, but it was dark and barely noticed.

We went upstairs and he selected the darkest corner of the seats and sat down pulling me onto his knee turning my head so we could kiss looking for all intents and purposes like many of the other young couples at any gig who use it as an excuse to snog their partner to their favourite bands.

The only difference was that he had pulled his cock out of his fly without pulling his trousers down (I do miss when low slung baggy trousers were in fashion for men. They offered excellent opportunities for access) and was slowly positioning the rip in my tights over his erection.

For a few seconds I had to hold myself up enough to pull my underwear aside and line the angles up before his cock slipped right into my cunt so I literally slid down his dick and sat down hard on his lap. Still with my head turned as we kissed, it looked entirely more innocent than it was.

To keep it that way, he used the tilt of the cinema style seats to tip his hips forward and back gently to fuck me while I had to basically sit still and push my clenched cunt down onto his cock to get as much movement and friction as possible. Sometimes it doesn’t take much to make someone come and this was one of those moments.

He came hard into me, pulling me down tighter onto his lap and pressing his face into my back I presume to hide any noise or facial expressions that might give away that we weren’t just hugging. I remember he seemed to come for what felt like forever as he thrust into me more. I don’t recall if I came but when my Master does that now the feeling of it always pushed me into another orgasm so I presume I did.

We sat for a few minutes with his cock still in my cunt, leaning back and allowing the energy to come back for both us before disentangling ourselves. He walked me back downstairs and we watched the rest of the gig in comfortable silence.

The only difference was that while an hour earlier I had been delighted with the shortness of my skirt now I was hoping I wouldn’t accidentally flash the rip in the crotch that advertised I really was a slut not just a fan of short skirts…

The Right Note

Base Urges

I enjoyed my Master’s texture challenge the other night even if it was less show and tell and more hide and seek inside my cunt at the time. It was interesting to focus on a different kind of feeling for once when masturbating and concentrate on tactile sensations rather than just the sensation of fullness.

This different focus kept me on my toes nicely to stop myself falling into my old bad habit of rushing orgasms when I masturbate so they don’t really satisfy me properly. Like snacking mouthfuls as you pass the fridge fills your stomach up but doesn’t engage or satiate your brain’s hunger, my tendency to come almost for the sake of it is wasteful.

That kind of functional orgasm does nothing for me. It doesn’t turn me on, it doesn’t help me sleep and it gives my sex drive the same sickly feel as eating too many sweets or snacks between meals. In a long term relationship that makes me as bratty as I’m ever likely to get but in my single days it lead to impulsive sexual decisions like being hopped up on sugar or food colourings from eating junk food.

One of the first things my Master did when he started training me was to regulate this tendency teaching to slow down and savour masturbating so I really got to know my body and feel the orgasms instead of the equivalent of bolting down the main course to get to dessert.

It really worked to focus me on his dominance and not my own flights of sexual fancy and  without being taught to pace myself and be less sexually superficial I would not have been able to submit to my Master properly or stretch myself as much as I have been. Psychologically I’d have lost my nerve if I’d rushed and physically it’s not a good idea to mix haste and large objects.

I haven’t been able to fuck properly for what feels like forever recently. First I was ill. Then that bout of bacterial vaginosis and the the antibiotics I took for it really knocked my cunt off course with it taking ages to get back to normal levels of lubrication. Then life has got in the way of seeing my Master or Princess to actually fuck and if that wasn’t annoying enough, my cunt now has thrush from the antibiotics. My body feels like one of those over stimulated toddlers that needs to sleep but forces itself to stay awake even though it’s miserable.

Some people just get really obviously horny when they go without sex. You know the kind that starts humping the furniture without totally noticing they are doing it? Other people use all that untapped energy to motivate them into other non sexual things like going running to burn off the frustration.

I get irritable and oddly un-sexual despite being incredibly frustrated and horny. It’s like if I don’t have sex I know I’m missing out on something but lose the ability to read the cue and just get grumpy and wound up emotionally while my cunt forgets to connect to my mind. I can’t tell if I’m tired, hungry, thirsty or horny until I’m reminded obviously like someone offers me a cup of tea or tells me to get on my knees for them.

I’m not sure why I’m so bad at translating my own bodily urges but it’s like I need constant reminders to work those almost primal muscles so they stay fit and active. I don’t really understand why my body’s response to a lack of things like food and sex in my day to life is to go into hibernation mode to wait out some kind of famine rather than actively seek out things that are essential bodily needs.

But I end up irritated and out of sorts but without the focus that I’m hungry or horny and need to go and do something about it. Instead I annoy myself with my bad mood and hope someone will offer me a sandwich or a threesome and then my brain finally makes the connection and starts communicating with my cunt or my stomach.

I’m in this stage at the moment but with the added frustration that my cunt is attention seeking in all the wrong ways and not welcoming the feeling of getting fucked. It’s like realising you are starving hungry and then discovering you can’t taste anything because you’ve got the cold.

If my body is forcing me to slow down so much my mind is starting to run away with itself  with ideas of submission to balance it out. I think I might have to ask my Master if he has any ways I can actively submit to him to keep me engaged but not likely to do something ill advised like fuck myself too soon out of frustration.

Only problem is that suddenly everything on that menu looks appetising to me. Now I know why women let men order for them…

Base Urges