Before I met my Master and then Princess, I hadn’t really done long term relationships. My relationships with men had tended to be a selection of one night stands, flings and the occasional one that lasted six months.
Commitment was a word that scared me and I was still in the frame of mind to treat it as just fucking. I never expected things with my Master to be more than a fling and it surprised me how much I liked it when it developed into more. I only freaked out a tiny bit in fact.
My relationship with him is the longest I’ve ever had and then Princess has become my second longest relationship (and yes, I’m aware that I like to go straight to the advanced level stuff here with both D/s and three of us involved.)
So I’m learning that in long term relationship sometimes not having sex is as much part of it as having sex together. Life has been getting in the way of kink recently and it surprised me how much I noticed the difference.
Some of that is clearly that you can’t really continue to constantly have the sheer amount of sex we were all having together. Someone would do themselves an injury at that level of smut. There has to be a natural ebb and flow of sex in the long term I guess.
But for me having come from short term relationships when sex reduces or changes, it usually means the end of the relationship is nigh, that is quite a mental adjustment to me not to worry or feel guilty in any way about it.
And in fact it was me who was the reason of Princess and I not having sex the other night which was disappointing as I’d been looking forward to it all day, but also just one of those things that happens when you are a committed relationship with no pressure or sense of an end point in sight.
Not having sex but still wanting to spend time together is a new kind of intimacy for me and one I’m learning to enjoy. Don’t worry though, I’m unlikely to give up the corsets for slippers and TV because I’m still incredibly horny for both my Master and Princess, but it’s good to change and evolve…